Friday, August 26, 2016

10 things you'd laugh about if someone told you they'll happen in your lifetime


1. You'll blame your alcoholism on your car


The 2020s could witness a spike in alcohol use. Knowing you have a sober 24/7 personal driver at your disposal could be to blame...




Autopilot will soon become as ordinary as GPS voice navigation. It seems inevitable: semi-autonomous cars already roll our streets,

Tesla Model S in autopilot

...Finland has introduced in Helsinki the world's first self-driving buses



and Singapore has started commercial trials of its self-driving cabs.








2. You'll go on a virtual Holiday

Virtual reality(VR) is the next big thing and Mark Zuckerberg knows it, that's why he recently bought Oculus for 2 billion dollars, the company at the forefront of VR.




The technology is already so immersive it's like nothing you've experienced before...


You have to watch this amazing Oculus Rift ad!


As it progresses interaction with real world objects and spaces aka "augmented reality" will become commonplace. It'll open a portal linking the mundane with the extraordinary...



...allowing you to transcend "daily". Where would you go with every bite of breakfast? Where would you take your every step? 



You could imagine "white canvas" arenas or sets specifically designed for virtual/augmented reality where, for a reasonable price, you'd get lost in wonderland for a day or two.


GIF by Beckett Muffson via

Virtual praise. Scene from Minority Report



3. You'll never have to do the laundry again


A team of researchers from Australia's RMIT University are testing a technology that breaks down the organic matter or "dirt" that accumulates on your clothes, when exposed to light. 


via bestanimatons

The magic is done by silver and copper based nano-structures that coat the clothes' fabric. 


credit: RMIT University

In the near future you'll only have to hang those floor laying garments on lighted hangers in lighted wardrobes and in six minutes your clothes will be as fresh as new!



A giant leap for last minute packing


...and smelly underwear


4. Having VR sex (finally)


Minority Report (2002)

Not only for the solo performer, virtual reality goggles will give role playing a whole new and better meaning




As an inevitable result of kinkiness combined with this technology, you and your partner, will one day find it irresistible to render a little fun on each other (aka "cosmetic virtual reality"). 



Have in mind, however, that your visions of toned hills and valleys could sink into soft terrain the moment you touch


so just embrace the technology with arms wide open



5. You'll one day text a Martian

Believe it or not you'll very soon look up from your phone to the night sky, realizing you've just received a message from someone who is millions of miles away!




Elon Musk, the billionaire entrepreneur behind Tesla, PayPal, Hyperloop and SpaceX plans to get human settlers there as soon as 2025


and he's got Proof of Concept. 




SpaceX recently made it to the history books (achieving what was once thought impossible): landing vertically, all the way from space, a 14-story-tall rocket on a wobbly platform in high seas



If successful, whoever it lands on Mars would surely have one of the most popular Facebook and Instagram profiles on Earth and the solar system!



Matt Damon in "The Martian"

But before you start a long distance relationship with a Martian, know it would require much patience. It takes 4 minutes for a reply to reach Earth from Mars...





or more than 20, depending on the planet's position in space. More ala "You've Got Mail" style.




Even if you never talked to them directly, you'd be able to follow the thoughts, photos and videos they'd post, literally from another world



How incredible would that be?


6. Becoming multilingual in one day



One June afternoon in 2032...



you'll see the marriage officiant making a two second pause after each phrase he pronounces. Catching up will be the translation spoken by earpiece to to the bride and groom who've never said anything to each other without the aid of microprocessors!




Skype already translates voice/video calls in real time. The technology will become so good and fast you'll probably have grandchildren, relatives or friends with who you communicate only via real time translators.




7. You'll have the POWER to STOP TIME

This goes back to the implications of Mark Zuckerberg having bought Oculus. Today we remember through photos; in the future Facebook will become a timeline of portals...




One Friday night, as we approach the second half of the century, you'll see Mike detaching from his phone a micro drone some mm across...


and as it raises up and flies over the party, it will 3D scan and record everything that happens. Building a virtual recreation of the moment.




A virtual memory.


You'll have to quit the celebration early but assured that back from work the next day, you'll be able to go back in time to the fun you missed...



With your VR headset on, you'll search for the memory in Mike's timeline and then: you'll restart it were you left.

As you walk around your living room the party comes back to life: A recreation so immersive, you feel the music bouncing amongst your friends' ethereal bodies




And just as she was last night, there is Hannah talking to a group of friends...


who looks a lot like Emma Watson

You'll call her and ask her to join you, remotely from her living room, and relive the moment




As she comes in, a second copy detaches from her initial lively recreation

not this creepy, hopefully

and it joins you as you seat together enjoying a drink with the party surrounding you, loud and indistinguishable from reality







8. You'll become omnipresent 


Living in a state of terror and getting ever more used to VR, it is foreseeable that our society will welcome new and more invasive forms of The Surveilled World. 

via bestanimations

Safety first, we won't mind most aspects of our lives recorded by all seeing drones: seemingly inoffensive, you'll be used to them peeking into your windows, like the passing bird

via bestanimations


and as amazing as google maps and street view would've seemed to someone in 1972



in 2060 you'll be able to remotely walk real-time recreations of the major cities of the world 


via bestanimations

while people, with blurred faces, go about their daily business, indifferent to the eyes watching and the software "virtualizing" every angle of their every move!

Via bestanimations




9.  Retiring off-world (for 500,000 dollars)

Billionaire entrepreneur Elon Musk also wants to give you the opportunity to retire on Mars.

Elon Musk with president Obama

The man behind the company at the forefront of the race to the Red Planet, is decided to cut the costs of getting there by building more efficient and reusable rockets




to the point where a ticket to Mars (with a guaranteed return if you wish to use it) would cost you "as little" as 500,000 dollars.





If he achieves that, selling all of your possessions might one day embark you on your greatest and final adventure.


Credit: SpaceX



10. Waking up to reality

As virtual reality becomes indistinguishable from the real world you'll begin to wonder if you were in a simulation all along.



See it this way:

Today your personal computer (be it your phone, your laptop or your gaming console) has the processing power that once occupied entire rooms...






and there are billions of personal computers out there




by the end of the century these machines could have the processing power to simulate our own universe...





Then the chance we are in the original universe would be one in the billions!






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